It’s dark and gloomy and rainy.

I’m not sure why I associate this with a wonderful fall day, I just do. Because we all know, rain and gloom and darkness still occur in summer … actually, let’s make that all seasons while we’re at it.

But today, it just feels fall to me. Which also makes it feel like nap time. Yet another indication I have been displaced in the wrong country — pas de sieste. What’s up with that, anyway?

Am I the only one who happens to think that if we had afternoon siestas, we’d all be a hell of a lot more productive … oh, and happy.

So. Turns out nothing says, “I care”, like a stungun. Yes, you read that correctly: stun + gun. It also says, “don’t even think about f-ing with THIS.”

Purchased for me by my guru. Who for some crazy reason, worries about me and B walking. It’s silly, really. But, touching, yes.

Of course I didn’t really think he was serious about the stunning — I prefer to say that instead of stun gun … sounds a lot more … lovely. Brings me back to warm, sunning days.

Anyway. I showed up yesterday, after he called to let me know he had a surprise waiting, only to discover, in a super cute case that resembles more a cell phone than anything, wrapped in yellow satin {because yeah, they know nothing screams, “this shit can f you up like yellow satin}, the gun.

He showed me how to use it, the whole time I was leaning way back and far left, completely freaked out. B and I both jumped a mile when he hit the button that actually does the stunning.

In fact, I’m scared to take it out of its case for fear I’ll somehow have switched it on, and then unbeknownst to myself, will accidentally stun moiself. Seriously, People — this is the kind of random shit that can and does happen to me. I’m not willing to take any chances here.

That’s what I have Brother around for. Stun tests. Perfect.