With this impending birth any day now, I’m just trying to do the best I can to calmly make it through each day.

I do pretty well, until the later night time hours hit … the ones where I suddenly feel like an addict looking for their next fix. I get it, I completely get it, the over whelming power of addiction. It has to be from such a strong onslaught of heavy emotion that hits and crashes like Tsunmami-esque waves. Over and over again.

Being with this emotion and giving in to it is petrifying. I’m thankful for it, as I’ve actually had to face my emotions and be with them … but damn, it is intense.

All of this is to say that {and I’m sure it goes without saying} I’ve been just a little bit pre-occupied these last couple weeks. Sometimes, I’m not sure if I make sense. I find I write and then just stop. If I sound disjointed, it’s because I am.

But, hey, I figure this is real life and real me — and thus, here is the current result. And it’s okay. I’ve never set out to be a Hemingway.

I might be pre-occupied and experiencing my random bouts of anxiety, however, I am feeling a peace … a true peace, the kind you can’t fake. I know it’s the non fakey kind because it permeates my being.

This peace tells me everything is going to be okay and to let go of all these unnecessary concerns. Think that’s what that whole church prayer response means? The, and peace be unto you, part?