You guys are catching me in the heat of the moment. Because I am fucking pissed the fuck off.

And fucking annoyed.

I probably shouldn’t be writing in such a state, but fuck it. I’m not going to censor myself. This is real life, real me and guess the fuck what.

I’m not always constantly super happy and super positive. Who the f is?  That should make some of you feel better.

I mean that in the sense that sometimes there’s those people that we perceive as always “on”, always so together or so freaking joyful that it’s annoying. I know it makes me feel better when I see these people in more challenging times … that I realize, oh good, they lose it, too. It’s not just me.

So. Here goes. My iphone got stolen tonight. And Maman’s.

WTF.

Seriously, unfucking real.

I’m not going to go into details of how it happened and rehash that — besides it being utterly pointless, I’ve already had to hear Maman go through it at least 11 times. No point. They were stolen.

Stolen is stolen.

This is my second iphone I’ve had stolen. What the hell is up with that? The other one, I had for two and a half months. This one I purchased five weeks and one day ago.

Know what I’m most upset about?

It’s not the phone itself — that can and will be replaced. It’s not the pictures, though it is a shame I hadn’t backed them up on that fancy icloud thing. It’s not the clock, because, I didn’t realize just how often I look at the damn time, till I no longer have it to look at. It’s not my {unbacked up} contacts or apps.

It’s that I attracted this. This. What. The. Fuck.

How did I attract this?! That’s the thing that bothers me, that has my mind racing … that somehow, I {we} was {were} a vibrational match to this.

I’ve been here, having such a wonderful time. Yes, I’ve thought about the different dark alleys I could be dragged down by psychos when I’m walking alone at night, but this … I haven’t thought about anything being stolen from me.

I never think anything will be stolen, because I’m always on my shit. I’m not exactly what you’d call a careless person — I’m a damn Taurus.

So how did this happen? How did I create this?

I’ve got to stop asking myself those questions and just keep moving on ahead. It happened. Nothing to be done about it.

You know, I’m not even pissed off at the girl who stole them. I said no details, but there’s one for you. She was young, too young to be stealing phones, so that tells me enough.

I don’t fault her, because she was just acting in the way that she felt necessary to survive, the best option at the time. People don’t do desperate things unless they’re feeling … well, desperate.

I prefer to think instead that this somehow has served its purpose well … that it’s helped her in the way she needed it too, even if it meant highly inconveniencing our lives.

And that, yes, there’s clearly some cleaning up I need to do in my vibrational energy … some fine tuning if you will.

I am off to bed … to sleep this off … to awake to a gorgeous morning and a perfectly gorgeous day ahead … that will be whatever I make it.