While I might throw out words and statements of believe and we need to trust — trust me when I say this is possibly the single most challenging thing for me to put in practice myself.

Does anyone out there actually enjoy trusting shit when you have no clue what is going on? And if you do, please tell me how you got to that point — at the least you’ll make me feel like there’s hope.

It’s not new news around these parts that I’ve been having a hard time post Paris.

Nor that I felt utterly betrayed that within two weeks of my absence, my world drastically changed. How the hell does that even happen?! Did Susan Miller withhold planetary info for the month of April?

There’s the Guru situation but the other kicker, that I couldn’t even mention till now … my cherished Zen Center. Gone. Tomorrow will be our last yoga in that sacred space.

That place holds so much meaning and significance to me for many reasons — one being this is where I met The BF, as well as Higher Self — how many people can say they got that kind of two-for-one out of a building?! Where I learned to sit and be still and in that stillness … hear.

These are big things for me. Things I will forever be thankful for. To lose the Zen Center literally feels like a piece of me is being lost.

So the two main stays in my life, the two things that are such a part of every day routine – gone. At the same time. It was a hard blow to be dealt. And it felt too much.

Too much to think about, to try to sort out, to figure out. When things feel too much, I do nothing. No action taken. Few words spoken. It’s these times where I sit more. Pray. Talk to The People.

Last week, while discussing things with The BF, I interrupted him to say, I can’t talk about this because I don’t know what to do and if I don’t know what to do, further discussion will only cause more confusion and heartache. I am at the point where I simply have to trust.

I hate trusting, People. I really do. But yet it was such a true statement — something I had been hearing within myself, that I just have to turn it over. Trust it is somehow working out.

So I told The People, People, if I am going to trust then show your ass up and handle this shit asap.

In the meantime, I made the yoga announcement to a few friends I really respect, admire and feel ridiculously blessed I even get to call friend. I put out the call and it was answered, rather quickly.

Today a solution was finalized for a new yoga home. It is not perfect but it is perfect for now. It will be good, I can feel it.

Trusting — looks like that shit really does work. Thrilling! It truly does thrill me and it shows me that I need to be doing this in so many more areas of my life. Less worry, more trust. Turn it over. We will all be taken care of.

We can do this. Together. This thing is not random.