Believe it or not, I’m not getting freaky.

I’m getting real; the down and dirty. The three way … mirror.

WHY, someone please enlighten the hell out of me here and tell me WHY these still exist in fitting rooms? Let’s be honest — has anyone ever had a good three way experience?

Any where you suddenly don’t catch a glimpse of your left backside covered in sporadic cellulite? Or where your ass doesn’t seem to have exploded overnight?

It’s really very devastating. It makes me thinks for hours, if not days, do I really look like that?

Silly, I know, all over a mirror. But they’re a little hard to escape! I think there’s a conspiracy against us. Some twisted ploy where those mirrors are fat mirrors.

Slim mirrors never did any wrong. Even if we know they might not be all that … accurate … don’t you at least feel better about yourself?

That, is worth more to me than cellulite exposure.

And as for cellulite, yoga has a cure : cold water dousing. Same can be said for cold showers, or a cold dip in a lake {ocean, any body of water}. Seriously, I never joke about cellulite, People.

It’s too bad I hate cold showers and anything where I’m willingly pouring freezing water over myself. For cellulite, I think it might be worth a try.