There are certain times in my life where my thinking mind shuts off. Completely.

I believe this is part coping mechanism, part denial {?} and part The People trying to help me out.

These “certain times” all fall under a common category of : shit that is just too much for me to think about. I’m tempted to use the word “stress”, as I’m not feeling all that stressed … but basically it’s the big stuff that turns my thinking mind off.

I kind of just … shut down. It’s those life events that simply feel too much for me to try to even process, grasp, or handle.

I’m thankful that my default reaction is more a survival-like Tolle concept of present momentness. See, denial and not being able to cope do serve a wonderful purpose in rendering one to the here and now!

Currently, this is serving me ten fold and then some. The rational part of me knows that at any minute, this babe could come and I should be ready. I should have hung those other pictures on the wall three days ago. And why the hell do I still have old blinds taking up half the closet in the office? And damn if I still haven’t gotten around to taking care of all those paint nicks.

Present moment me, however, does not give a flying F about any of it. Present moment self is all, yeah whatever this baby is coming when it comes, no big f-ing deal. And says things like, those GD paint nicks can wait another six months, or until you finally convince Brother to just suck it up and do it for you.

I really like present moment me. A lot.