Maman is back. Yes. Again. More Gpa estate.

I stopped by this afternoon to give her a huge hug and infuse her with some love and positive vibes. I know this has been an extremely stressful time for her.

On the one hand, I selfishly enjoy having her around so frequently … perhaps a precursor of things to come? I can only hope on that front, People.

I also stopped by to harass Brother, because that’s what I do. Well, that and try to convince him to do all the things I don’t want to do. Which he, miraculously, never minds doing for me, like yard work. Um. People. How did I get so lucky with him?

I can say with 1000% certainty that, as meetings were held, probably more like summits, about my Earthly return, The People used Brother {in addition to The Candy} as bait. And as an absolute — I’d be able to do this life thing if I had him with me. Actually, not just do, but kick its ass, conquer some shit up in here.

Harassment aside … Brother and I both agreed that we needed a long walk, so he came over with B — totally jacking Murph up, because that’s his sexy bitch number 1, and we had an incredible walk.

I always walk way longer with Brother. We might be known around these parts to walk for two plus hours. What can I say. We just can’t stop. Ok. We can stop, but B can’t. No, really, she can’t.

Any of ya’ll out there with a Pointer know what I’m talking about. Those dogs just go. We’ve attempted on numerous occasions to tire her out, to no avail — and I’m talking with hours of intense exercise. You think she’s down, only to be ready to go an hour later.

I really admire that kind of get up and go drive. If only I was as tightly wound as a Pointer. I take that back. No one would want to see nor experience that. Least of all me.

We had just started out on our walk when Murph stopped, about three houses down to “mark territory”. It’s actually one of my favorite houses, despite it being a complete falling down eye sore on the street.

It’s not really falling down, but it has a sad back story to it and has been abandoned for five years. I love it. There is something very magical about it to me. I imagine all kinds of treasures inside. Alright, so maybe that’s been verified by my sneaky self looking in the windows and snooping around back. It is huge place and has the potential to be gorgeous … I keep hoping the right buyer will come along and fix it up.

Anyway. Murph does his “marking” and since I was anxious to get the walk going, I asked Brother if he thought, since no one is even living in this place, if it was alright if I picked up after, as we ended the walk. Neither one of us thought it was a big deal.

And then the voice, People. Loud and seething and just plain nasty.

Excuse YOU! Aren’t you going to pick up after your dog? What, you’re just going to leave that there!

I turned around to face my accuser and instantaneously thought of a minimum of seven smart ass things to say in response. I thought of how good it would feel, but then there was Higher Self, being all Highery Selfy on me.

So I took a deep breathe, and said that yes, I would be picking up, at the end of the walk. I debated picking up right then and there, but I’m a stubborn Bull, and I wasn’t about to give her that kind of satisfaction.

Brother and I walked off, both of us now seething.

Of all the things! Getting called out for not picking up when I’ve never not picked up! If anything, Brother and I are always on everyone else’s clean up duty — oh, the irony. Yet now here is my neighbor thinking I’m the a-hole who doesn’t pick up.

Perfect.

For the first 20 minutes of our walk, we talked about how angry she was, her whole tone was just so … unpleasant. Hadn’t she seen me before, all the other hundreds of times we’ve been out, picking up after Murph? Why did she have to make an immediate assumption? We both made some rather not nice comments, which always makes me feel better at first, but that wears off pretty damn quick.

I’m getting to the point Peeps, where it simply doesn’t feel good to trash talk anyone, even when it seems completely valid by shitty actions or situations.

Because it never really helps. Never really adds anything. Actually, it always ends up making me feel worse and further out of sorts.

So Brother and I decided to spin the situation. I started rattling off what was good about what happened … it took me a while but then it came … I thought how nice it was to have a neighbor who cares whether or not people pick up after their dogs, who care about keeping a clean neighborhood. I thought … maybe she had had a bad day and maybe, I should go knock on her door and thank her.

Of course, I couldn’t stand the idea of it. And my ego really didn’t approve. Thank her? Wouldn’t that be like apologizing, admitting your guilt somehow for something you didn’t technically do?

Egos are so tricky like that. They like to keep us all bunched up about things that don’t truly matter. That’s why it’s great Higher Self is there to counter with truthful calm.

Higher Self loved the idea of thanks. Plus. How can one not be disarmed by a thank you? And wouldn’t it be nice to have a neighbor as a friend instead of an enemy?

When Brother and I finished our walk, I grabbed a bag and did my obligatory pick up. Then I kept going, picking up all the little pieces of trash I saw scattered about in other neighbors’ yards.

I was so in my trash zone that I didn’t see her come out, I only heard the voice.

I am so sorry! I feel so terrible! I can’t believe I yelled at you like that! I’ve been watching for over an hour, hoping I’d catch you so I could apologize. Please forgive me. I’m so afraid I made a terrible impression and you’re my new neighbor, which makes it so much worse!

Naturally I do the thing I normally do in these sorts of situations : laugh. Because it really was funny. She started laughing, too. We talked about what a misunderstanding the whole thing was, and how she had just had one of those rough days and didn’t mean to take it out on me.

We ended up having such an enjoyable conversation, and I was once again reminded of how powerful it is not to make the assumption back. When in doubt, doubt. We should be giving others the benefit of the doubt. Believe the best. Look for something good, some kind of positive.

And I did thank her. It was good to be called out. And it was good to know that people are watching and they do care. Our actions matter, regardless of how small they seem.

And People. How quickly an apology disarms. How quickly laughter can heal.