I had dropped TC off from our fabulous Cincinnati Symphony night, and was halfway home.

When I promptly did an illegal U-Turn at a light. I have a thing about illegal U-Turns. I think it comes from having learned how to drive in D.C. That’s like a pre-req to being a fully fledged licensed driver.

It was Guru. I had to go there. For two reasons.

1. I felt like I could face it and it’s always a good idea to face things when we feel strong and capable of doing so.

2. I miss him so much, that it helps me feel connected to him.

I sat for a few minutes in front of the store. Staring at an empty space. Thinking about how odd life can be, how so much can change so quickly. Yet life is still continuing. An entire store that was packed to the brim … now … nothing.

I thought about how for so many Saturday’s throughout this last year and a half I had begun my day there … roll out of bed, swing by with my coffee and sit with him. Even if I felt I didn’t have the time, I’d at least pop in for a quick hi.

Tonight was the first time I was able to think about him without an overwhelming sense of grief gripping me. And his words rang in my ears, stay happy. Just stay happy. You’ve got to always try to stay happy.

He’s right. That’s exactly what I am going to do.