I feel a great sense of relief now that you know I’m knocked up. It’s still cringe worthy news to share so publicly, but to hell with it. It was time.

For starters I don’t have to bullshit anymore and you won’t wonder why I do things like this and call it a post.

I also can be completely upfront about how shitty I feel — though it’s going to be a delicate dance, because I don’t want this to turn into a pregnancy bitch fest. No one wants to hear about that, especially me.

Does complaining ever look good on anyone? Maybe Gisele? Probs. I have such a girl crush on her. I think I could stare at her all day long. I don’t think we could be friends, because I wouldn’t hear a word she was saying.

I’d just continue my creepy stare, most likely directed at her legs. Would love to know what yoga poses she’s doing.

So now that the cat is out of the proverbial bag. can you keep it on the dl for me? What a request considering I’m on the public interwebs! It was a lot easier saying things on here when I knew no one was reading.

I know I don’t really have a right to ask that. I only 30% mean it. Because I’m obvs still in preggo child denial. Me … a mother?!

Lord have mercy on me. It’s enough to get me back to church. I need holy water. Even though I’m not Catholic {or Orthodox}. I don’t get how holy water can discriminate. Shouldn’t that be for all?