TC and I had dinner together tonight. I decided few things would be more shocking than offering to take him out to dinner.

See, now that I’m going to be a parent, I’ve had these flashes of the times I’ve been an ass to my parents. They’re probably much fewer and farther between than the average, considering I talk to TC and Maman every single day and we are all up in each other’s business constantly.

Well, mainly, TC. He has to know everything about everything and everyone. I’m not really sure how, but he even knows everything about the neighbors, without talking to them.

He says this is because he wakes up in the middle of the night and sits in the living room, watching the street. He’s seen fights, cheating spouses, teenagers sneaking in and out of their houses, attempted robberies, and listened to full blown personal conversations with the windows opened. It’s the lawyer in him, I think. That whole getting to the bottom of things.

But, anyway, I’ve been wanting to show some daughter-parental appreciation. Now that I am beginning to fully comprehend what Maman went through to bring me into the world, revelations have been made. The least I can do is show my thanks.

During dinner, TC, after a particularly heated rant, looked at me and said, what’s wrong with you! Aren’t you going to join in my outrage? I need outrage support! Get worked up!

I had to fill him in on FOH now having a soul and that from here on out I am in a perpetual {yeah, right!} state of calm and positivity. It’s all joy up in this motha.

He looked at me, stunned. Into silence. Which I’ve only witnessed on three other occasions in my entire life with him. He finally gathered himself and still stunned, responded, God Damn. What, BE CALM?! Jesus, do I have to be calm now because I’m around you and anyone around you also needs to be enlightened? If so I don’t think I can see you anymore but then who can I complain to?!

I assured him he didn’t have to be calm. But he should try. For FOH’s sake. Doesn’t he want to be a calm grandfather?

Let me tell you, calm is god damn overrated. Nothing would get done in this world if everyone walked around so god damn calm.

Did I mention yet that he likes saying God Damn?

There you have it, People. TC summed up right there. I don’t agree with that statement at all, but this is someone who lived off adrenaline in his career, so I get it.

But anyone can benefit from at least a calmer attempt … I think? I’ll keep you posted on my foray into calm. We shall see.